We Are Water !!

Photo by Raymond Holberg

I love a fresh, clean, simple glass of water - it provides me a refreshing break in the day as I dive into the metaphors of cleansing and nourishment.  Happily I have lately been finding all kinds of ways to enjoy this healthy activity of drinking more water.  Simply. 

It feels good to connect with the 60+% of me that is fluid, this part I can so easily forget.  The fluid parts of me that flow and bend and relax.  Versus taking care of the muscular parts of me that often screech and call for vast amounts of attention.  This is the silent part that does it’s best to keep me healthy.

Water feeds our skin, the largest organ of our body, and it balances our digestive fires as well as flushing daily toxins out.  In fact I wonder if my recent thirst is related to the fire of emotions we have all experienced this past year and a half.  An attempt to calm them down, cool the singed edges.   

I first grew to appreciate the simple act of drinking water when I began gardening.  Those plants needed water.   Like the soil they were planted in, they equally needed water in order to thrive and grow. And they needed it consistently.    

We are really not all that different from the plants.  We need to feel safe rooting/grounding into the earth beneath us as well as relaxed, like the gentle flow of a stream, in order to thrive and take even the smallest steps toward growth.  Grounded and Relaxed - it is probably worth asking yourself “What do you need to gift yourself these qualities?”

Many people I know immerse themselves in water regularly, swimming their laps with focused energy.  Perhaps absorbed in the motion or floating with abandonment, freeing  the mental habits of the mind.   It is in fact probably the best thing they can do for themselves.  And intentionally or not, connecting with, aligning with, the 60+% of themselves that may have been forgotten.   Very healing self care in action.

Some friends of mine need their dose of the sound and smell of the ocean air regularly, to be near that ozone blast and force of wild nature.  Reportedly the ozone increases your ability to absorb oxygen and balance serotonin levels. This too feeds the silent parts - physically and emotionally.   Another very healing action, turning toward these elemental forces.

So they say that as humans we should drink 8 glasses of 8 ounces of water a day or alternatively just over 1/2 of your weight in ounces.  Though not everyone has the same requirements due to diet, overall health, and the amount of exercise they get, humidity, etc.  You get the idea.  Important to note: if you’re thirsty you are already dehydrated!  There are times when I wait until my lips are parched, my mouth chalky and then remember “oh yeah water” knowing it’s a little late in the game for staying in the curve of healthy, self care.

There are many benefits of increasing your daily water intake, here are just a few;

·    Moisture - Lately I have been adding a daily dose of collagen in my glass of water in an effort to add extra moisture to my hair, nails, and lubricate my joints.  This can help balance out the effects of the natural aging, drying process. 

·    Heart Health - Did you know?  Water is important for the electrical impulses that regulate your heart beat.  And we all want a regular heart beat!  Our bodies are like an intricate machine and they need their fluids to run smoothly, efficiently, and evenly timed.  

·    Cognitive Health - Let’s talk mental fogginess -  an adequate amount of daily water can make a big difference in this common malady.  Imagine you have an important meeting coming up, along with a sense that the clarity, the focus is just not there for you.  Most of us go for the caffeine, a dehydrator.  Water may be your more productive choice.  The brain itself is approximately 75% water and a small amount of dehydration results in 5 times the amount of decreased cognitive function.  Keep up your water reserves to think faster, focus more clearly, and gain the clarity we all seek by drinking water.

·    Facial Skin - The best thing we can do for the skin on our face, after sunscreen, is to drink our daily allotment of water.  This keeps our face hydrated and healthy looking, providing each cell what it needs to stay plump and elastic.  Because our cells, like our body composition are by nature 60%+ water. 

And it’s not lost on me living in California, that this craving for enjoying a sense of an abundance of water, is happening along side our most serious drought in years.  The earth too is thirsty !  Importantly we’re asked to conserve and yet there are still ways to be extravagant with a day at the beach, an hour in the pool, a refreshing moment at the kitchen tap.

So do your part.  Do it for your silent parts.  Take the next moment to enjoy and truly feel your body absorb a cool glass of healing water.

Maintaining a Healthy Perspective

Ready for the Bounce !

Whoa - It’s been quite the year!   Once again we are in the throes of a Covid surge while regular life just keeps rolling on over us.  Life is always a thrill ride - the ups, the downs, and now with Covid on the top, it’s the ride that really none us signed up for.   Some of us lost our jobs, some - all of a sudden, had too many jobs - like kids needing to be home schooled.  Some friends lost everything in the wildfires, and some of us faced family sickness and tragic loss. Our world has descended into chaos along with a political freak show to accompany it. 

In early March I had the inside track, this virus was going to be bad.  Optimistically thinking I thought we would be through the worst of it come June, I recalculated, well maybe it will be August, I will just coast for a bit longer.   And now it has become clear I can no longer wait on the sidelines for this virus to go away and for everything to return to normal.  Foolishly , because I have known, as already having been rigorously taught, Nothing ever returns to what it was, going backward is not really ever an option.  So how do we maintain a healthy body and mind in this pandemic?

No more pretending, no more looking away.  This is our reality and I have decided I need to pay attention and to get prepared for the Bounce.   It’s going to arrive and I want to be ready, want my body to be ready, to seize the moment,  the moment when the world will seem to right itself again and offer up its pearlescent array of possibilities for growth and adventure.  The moment when our conversations will shift in excitement and colors will shine with brilliance.  I can almost hear the world let out a big sigh of relief for the moment when Covid will slide back into the history of the past. 

I am so far from being ready for that moment right now.  At times my body is weak, my mind is mushy, my habits have slipped into utter distraction.   After 9 months of rationalizing that I needed, I deserved, the urge to escape, I am beginning to see through all of that right now.

How to adapt to our Covid environment?  Mere tolerating the situation month after month is not the answer.  No on the contrary, this time is calling on the best of us - our creativity, our strength, our faith.  For me after years of letting go, I am feeling the need now for a discipline, or regimen, to hang onto.  The will to coax my mind body back into a place that has the capacity to bounce because the time will come.  And I want to be ready.  How about you?

Slowly, slowly, my minutes of gentle feldenkrais exercises in the morning are coming back, along with the sit ups and the newly determined push ups that are starting to click in, my body does know how to do this.   The afternoon hill walks with 65 pounds of lurching dog on the leash end, are also helping.  My meditation practice is thrilled after waiting ever so patiently for my return, and my sugar habit - well there is still a lot of work to do on that.   My mind too needs revitalizing, and I am confident it will sync up once my body moves into its’ renewal phase.

I am continually inspired by those of you I know, who found your creative vein to make the best of this situation, challenging though it is.  You Inspire me to engage!  This is living and not just waiting. 
 

·      Embarking on weekend kayaking trips – camping by the water’s edge for that midnight cruise in your inflatable kayak

·      Creating visionary artistic expression – curating local artists for outdoor light sculpture installations

·      Developing new skills for satisfaction and some badly missed income - designing a pattern for exceptionally comfortable mask wearing and then crowdsourcing to sell them from your bedroom window.

·      Committing to a cause passionately - Driving to an unknown place to knock on unknown doors for persuasive conversation with unknown people and…you’re an introvert

·      Embracing your fears – moving to a new place and putting down new roots after years of stability.
 

How about you?  Where are you on this spectrum between living and waiting?    The next few months, maybe more, are asking us to be diligently careful, along with resolute in creating what we need in this new place we all find ourselves. There is so much to learn, some of it practical, much of it hard to put into meaningful words, yet sage wisdom never a less.   Our vibrant health is the most valuable thing we have, creative carefulness is our calling right now. 

I would really like to hear what keeps you going, or what slows you down to that thoughtful pause, what intuitively you know might change in these next few months.  It helps to have support in figuring out where your hope lives, as Barbara Kingsolver writes above.  It helps to have conversations that motivate and clear the obstacles embedded in your mind.  It really does help to have a plan, and I am happy to explore this with you.

Habits and routine can help us stay grounded when all feels adrift or confused.  And we do live in difficult, confusing times.  I find poetic beauty in Rumi – “there are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.” There are hundreds of ways to adapt, to find your balance, to maintain a healthy mind and body.  

The art is in finding the ways that work for you now given our new situations.   Stay open to the chance that they may be different than what you expected.   New habits for new times.  Are you courageous enough to dive in? 

 As David Whyte writes ~ “Beginning is difficult and our procrastination is a fine ever- present measure of our reluctance in taking that first close-in courageous step to reclaiming our happiness.”   

 I don’t know if it is happiness, or a sense of well being, or contentment that I seek, but I know I am ready to begin again and in that desire and follow through I will be ready for when the bounce comes.  I will begin again and again and again to find that new bandwidth of movement and strength for which to kneel and kiss the ground  -  Or maybe I will dance !   
 

Connection during Covid Times

Photograph by Saffu

So how is it going - this swimming in a sea of uncertainty and concerned watchfulness?  This challenge of staying separate and yet connected, of pulling back while leaning forward.   We all share many of the same hopes, the same fears, the same anxieties, especially during times like these.  Walking around the neighborhood it feels good to offer the friendly smile or nod of the head, acknowledging we are all in this together.

In fact one of my awakenings that I have learned from my clients over the years is that so many of us hold a strong value around connection and a desire for a sense of community.  A value strong enough that if their world were falling sideways this word, this experience of connection would be the one thing with the power to right their ship.  A guiding force toward happiness and health.   

So we all crave connection and likely more so now that we are being asked to hold ourselves separate.  The Corona dilemma.... And our world has gone askew as we hear about so many - one day healthy, the next day seriously ill.  These times call us to open our hearts and change our habits, maybe in some cases not such a bad thing?  And the call goes out to be creative in how we stay connected, how we are supportive and how we stay healthy in our body and mind. 

I thought I would share some resources and a story, both to inspire and if needed to right your ships during this storm.  All of these are natural stress and anxiety reducers, and stress, much like sugar unfortunately, weakens the immune system.   Let’s all keep our immune systems strong, vibrant, and optimally functioning during this time!

• I have for years now been Meditating for health, for awareness, and personal growth. Meditation is nothing more than taking a few quiet moments to check in with yourself and ask "How am I right now?  What am I really feeling?  Where am I feeling it?"   And then opening to that vulnerable place, the place we perhaps unconsciously keep hidden away.  I imagine quite a few of us feel some form of anxiety with the uncertainty that surrounds us right now.  These quiet meditative moments give our bodies and nervous systems a chance to find their equilibrium, rebalance and find some spaciousness that was being crowded out with fear and worry.  Let your breath be the self soothing, nurturing presence it is meant to be.  

• Many of us had a regular practice of Exercise that we can no longer do publicly.  Maybe swimming, weight training, yoga or rock climbing?  And now more than ever with the built up stress or anxiety it is important to find an alternative.  I went to a regular pilates class that kept my body aligned, strong and healthy.  So now what?  There are many online yoga and pilates classes being offered in the safety of your own home, hiking (6 feet apart) in nature with a friend could be a very healthy option, more creatively turning the lights down and having an in-house dance party of your own ( thinking maybe the Kinks or Shins), or quiet, free form movement.  Really anything that helps get us out of our heads and into the beauty of a body in motion!

• A Healthy Diet right now is a must for the internal workings of a healthy body.  We have been cooking at home, actually only my husband has been cooking for our safety, more about that below....I know this is new territory for some, yet now that you have the space and time, cooking for yourself can be very creative and nourishes the mindbody in ways “to go” cannot.  So why not enjoy a new recipe, or spice, or free form food combo!  

• Laughing and staying connected socially can make the difference between feeling anxious or feeling loved.  Try out the apps Zoom or House Party for a virtual cocktail party, costume party, or open mic stand up.   Friends near and distant are just out there waiting for an invitation!

• And don’t forget your favorite Local businesses, restaurants and providers who may not be getting that government check soon enough, or ever.  Lend your support by reaching out with an online purchase of a gift card or order that you can use in the future.  Many are providing curbside pick up which I venture to guess is likely more sanitized than a warehouse delivery.  

And now my story.  Personally I have had a challenging month.  I came down with a viral infection that settled in my respiratory system.  I lost my voice literally and maybe figuratively too as I could not write to you my HeartWisdom family.  Actually I myself was a little lost, very distracted and a little fearful not only for myself also for my immediate family, close friends, and our global community.  My symptoms checked all the boxes for Covid19 and seemed to last forever.  Finally after waiting 11 days for my test results to come back I can now joyfully report they are negative!!   This changed my entire perspective - my world got a little brighter, a little bigger, a little less anxious.  This change in perspective was mentally shape shifting and reminded me of a skill I practice with many of my clients, that we define our own reality in many ways.  I still have to manage this ongoing bronchitis, though can do it now without the added weight of “what ifs” and separation.

Right now I am offering my skills as a wellness coach and meditation teacher.  I am happy to lead you in an inquiry or if you like your own personal meditation to help you weather this challenging time.  Or maybe you would like to experience a new, previously unimaginable perspective that lives within?    If you are feeling anxious, fearful, confused, or something else?   I would love to Connect and support you with a few minutes of Wellness Coaching - meaningful, honest conversation, completely free and confidential, completely open-hearted and connecting. 

We are connected !  
Shunya

It's 2020 ! And Time for Change

photo by Danielle Macinnes

"Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it.  Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.  Begin it now.”

It’s 2020 !   The sound of it, it’s visual balance, a place which for many of us was by definition “the faraway future.  Well, it is now here and is undeniably an important  benchmark.
 
Much to the amusement of my husband, I believe in celebrating any and all occasions, aware that time is leaving its mark.  Standing up and taking notice, having a ritual, taking a pause.  This is the perfect time to do just that and harness your energies toward what matters most for you.
 
We will look back and say 2020, Yes, that was the year I - turned my focus toward self care, shifted a relationship (with self or other), made a positive impact, or.....  You fill in the blank! 
 
And as we know these changes that are meaningful for us often take determination, inner strength, resolve.   It takes some degree of resolve for channeling our habits in a desired direction and also to examine the conditions that reinforce these habits, changing them if necessary.
 
Resolve - definition, n. A firm determination to do something. From the Latin roots of to loosen - which I love when you think in relation to habits or tendencies.  Our habits can bind us, our resolve can free us!  
 
But first things first - did you make a resolution, or have an aspiration?   It's kind of like the lottery-you have to pick your numbers and actually buy your ticket for a chance to win. Though you can increase your odds with the following suggestions; 

• Be specific - describe in detail what your goal entails.  The time of day, the duration, the specific result you are seeking,

• Write this commitment down, in a way that you can carry it with you, mentally and physically.  This can be a screen saver for your phone, a bracelet you wear on your wrist, or a note on the bathroom mirror.  Imprint it in your schedule so there is no chance you will forget ... or ignore it.

• Reflect on why this is important for you.  What do to have to gain by following through?  What do you have to loose?  And what is important about each?  

• Plan for success, Think ahead, Design each day.  What is going to help me make it to the gym ( for both body and mind ), or the meditation cushion, etc ?  Is there something I need to reprioritize?  What might get in the way?  And then make the necessary adjustments because you want this - this is your winning ticket!

• Tell someone - select carefully because this person is going to hold you accountable.You are not going to be tempted by distraction with this person on your side, who is creatively tuned to your personal challenges and commitments.

Recent Neuroscience studies have made some very favorable discoveries.  The patterns in our brains can be changed, they are pliable and can be shaped into new patterns with repeated effort.  Just like a well worn hiking path that for years has directed you from point A to B, you can forge a new path in the brain, literally. The neurons that fire together when you make a choice, set an action, over repeated time will wire together.  With practice your tendency to reach for the sweetest, largest desert falls away and you actually prefer that perfect pear or juicy tangerine.  
 
This year I resolved to be in the garden more, working and engaged with this creative endeavor.  Imagining myself surrounded by the simplicity of native plants and nature.  I think this native emphasis likely suggests  a symbol for;  belonging, a sense of being at home in, genuine in my own expressive nature and comfortable that I am exactly where I need to be and who I need to be.  It points to some of my values of creativity, being true to myself, comfort, and truth. 
 
Which brings me to conditions.  Our conditions - what we surround ourselves with, what we do with our down time, our attitudes and self beliefs, some of them likely long held, can all have a very large impact.  Taking a focused look at these conditions shines a light on what will help usreach our goals and equally important, a look at what hinders us from reaching our goals.  
 
The HeartWisdom Coaching process helps you become clear on what your core values are, which of your self beliefs will help you on this quest and which ones will undermine your efforts.  It helps you discover where to find your resolve, your strength, and your voice.   As your coach, I will not only hold you accountable but will be very curious about what might get in your way so that you can forge that new path, free of your typical obstacles. 
 
It's early into 2020 and not too late to reset your efforts.  This is a year we will all remember for personal, political, and global change.  A personal benchmark to look back on and remember that specific fork in the road that took you exactly where you want to go and exactly who you want to be.  

Note:  If this Blog looks familiar, this is because parts of it have been inspired by one of my previous writings.

Acceptance - Is the Messiness Worth it?

I am thrilled to say that Tiny Buddha, an established wellness platform, just published my writing on Acceptance. You can view it here or read along below. Let me know what you think !

Acceptance by its very nature is imperfect; it’s messy and often unpleasant, while ultimately leading to a place of growth, a sense of freedom, and a life familiar with ease. I know this because I have had a lot of painful acceptance in my life, and it has been crucial to helping me move beyond the stuckness of fear and suffering.

Years ago, being the natural striving, fun-seeking, achievement-oriented person I was, I ignored the fact that my body felt like a truck had run over it. I pushed, faked, and hid what my body was really feeling… until it all came to a screeching halt.

Diagnosed with lupus, an autoimmune disease, and a future of chronic pain or worse, I had to give up the impressive job, the active social life, and the self-image that had all propped me up in the world.  And then what was left?

Instinctively, I wanted to go back to the way things were, to repatch it all back together again.  Fortunately, I inherently felt the impossibility of all of that, and so the work began.

I started taking a meditation class and then a Buddhist practice, and one day sitting silently, feeling my body breathing, listening inwardly to what was there, the hard, guarding shell around my heart broke.  I had to accept there was no going back to normal, there was only being with what is and opening to where that might lead.

Acceptance is not resignation. It is not passively giving up. It takes courage and strength. 

I feel it more of a falling inward, dropping into the sensations of what is, recognizing and acknowledging what’s there. A place of empowerment and choice instead of feeling like a victim to chance. It is a beautiful sense of coming home to the body in the present moment, a feeling of wholeness and strength to better face your circumstances, whatever they may be.

That being said, there were a lot of tears and a lot of pain; in other words, it was messy. A series of small steps, it took a while.

I had to accept that I could no longer keep up with my carefree, energetic friends as they traveled around the world and partied around the clock.

I had to accept I would no longer create interesting buildings as an architect or participate in gallery shows as an artist.

Most difficult of all, I had to accept that I could no longer be the fun-loving, happy person my husband needed—at least not right away.

I had to accept my life had suddenly taken a new direction and be receptive to the possible changes that this might bring. Receptivity was the key to opening toward inner growth and inner intimacy, as well as a place of gentleness, all new territory for me!

So what is your experience of acceptance really like? Maybe there is an image or metaphor that best viscerally says “acceptance” to you. To me, it feels like a slow-motion fall into an undercurrent that sweeps me away.

It can feel quite beautifully poetic as a surrender into what is present, which floods me with a feeling of relief. It is more honest, more pure, less tinged with the shoulds of daily life—as in the pressure to be more productive, to be energetically outgoing, to follow through on all of my perceived responsibilities as a daughter, a wife, a friend. 

Allowing myself to actually be the way I felt, without the weight of someone else’s expectations, was the beginning of moving toward physical and emotional health.

Rilke writes, “Gravity is like an ocean current that takes hold of even the strangest thing and pulls it toward the earth. We need to patiently trust our heaviness—even a bird must do this before it can fly.”  

Trusting that the earth will support all of our weight, all of our heaviness, the physical pain and the mental anguish too, brings us to a place of feeling grounded, a place that’s ready to respond with wisdom and compassion, though this does take practice.

Pulling away from our pain or ignoring a life difficulty is a kind of resistance, a fighting of gravity, and an easy habit that will not heal our difficulties.

This tiring cycle of the push and pull of resistance makes everything difficult and takes a lot of energy, draining you of anything positive. It’s exhaustive like continuously having a really bad day.

Resisting that all aspects of my life had changed made the changes much more emotionally painful.  Stuck in this place of denial, I was unable to connect in the ways that nurture deep friendships and that create authentic appreciation for life’s small pleasures.

Recognizing the inner discomfort, it’s worth asking, “What am I resisting?” And even better “Do I want to be in acceptance mode or resistance drain?” And finally, “What is it that I need to accept?”

We all hold onto some kind of emotional pain by pushing it away in an effort not to be hurt, which ultimately and ironically keeps this pain very close. But what would it take to let it go? What is it that wants to be acknowledged and ultimately accepted?

And this pain, whether physical or emotional, leads to tight muscles and tight mental habits, a pattern of tenseness, a pattern of protectiveness that sucks the joy and spontaneity out of your life. Again, not much fun, not much pleasure. Trying harder and harder, like pulling on a necklace or shoestring that is knotted, will only make things worse.

Embracing life, not just the edited parts of it but all of it, is a place of wisdom and grace. I can find this place sometimes in movement or in meditation, and often these are the same, because as quiet as your body/mind can get in meditation, at all times it is gently moving with every breath. This is the movement that grounds your learning into the very tissues and neurons that make you tick.

If you can find your learning in the body, feel it in the body, you will not forget your experience or the glimpses of insight just discovered. The dancer Augusta Moore once told me “The breath is the music in the body.” I love this—the dance of life unfolding with each breath.

So why do we try to hold on so tightly to what was, even though it creates nothing but frustration and pain?

Once we find the means, whatever this might look like, it feels so damn good to drop the efforting, to accept, to fall apart a little, or perhaps a lot, and then move on, move forward with our new reality and all it has to offer. It can feel so good to allow this deep relaxing in the body, find that place of peace and feeling of liberation.

And embracing life is what it is all about. We want to respond whole-heartedly, not with dullness or avoidance or anger. The danger lies in blocking too much of our self, guarding against the pain, the fears, or sense of being trapped in denial.

Staying true to our entire experience allows us to loosen our responses, drop the guard, and be in a place of acceptance. As David Whyte writes, “The price of our vitality is the sum of all of our fears.”

I have heard it said, and reluctantly have felt this truth, that the body cannot lie. So I invite you to find a quiet moment and listen deeply to what it is your body really wants to tell you, the inner wisdom it wants to share in healing; whether it’s an illness that has taken you down or a broken relationship that feels like it has left you stranded, your body/mind knows how to heal, and acceptance is the key to opening that door.

With an open heart and a willing mind, really hear what your strongest ally, your body, wants you to know: that this partnership, between the mind and the body is a strong one, it is a relationship that will guide the winds of change with grace and ease. Acceptance helped me learn to listen within, and then trust what I heard, trust just what my personal world was asking me to respond to, and step peacefully forward into that vibrant flow of life.  

Marching Towards our Deepest Intentions

Millions of women are marching today to let their voices of protest be heard.  Marching towards a better, more equal future.  They are turning towards our political reality and confronting the forces in place. How about your inner reality? What do you want to change that may require a turning towards, perhaps with the determination of a march? 

After the Holidays and an energetic turning outwards, it is now January and that pushing energy needs a rest.  Again it's the natural time for this - rainy, colder, darker, perfect for slowing down and taking notice of how you are and where your are. Tapping into also what you are hoping for in the future.  A turning towards the interior life and body, both of which could probably use a big dose of self care.  And the future is now. 

How do we do this?   Not in the same sense of checking something else off our to do list or even in declaring your New Years resolutions, most of which apparently go unnoticed by February.

It's a determined shift in attitude, or a change in perspective, and setting aside the time to internally check in.  It's a time for de-cluttering of home, heart, and mind - time for real conversations, quiet and rest, and time to dig deep below the everyday expectations to find out just how we are and what we want for ourselves this New Year.   And as a protest March relies on the supportive group, this interior work too may need some outside support - friends, family, or professional resources.

Taking care of a cold requires lots of orange juice, vitamins, extra rest, all because our bodies tell us that we need extra self care when we get sick.  How about stress?  At times our bodies too are telling us we are stressed and this needs care as well.   I have been known to say "I don't really have much stress in my life."  Recently various external situations changed overnight creating a lot of stress and Bingo all of my chronic issues flared up.  Issues I was sure were not related to stress but turns out stress is a factor, always a factor.  Which is why taking the time to be quiet and honestly turning toward what you really need for yourself is the self care your body has been calling for.  And now is the perfect time!

Singhashri, meditation teacher and Breathworks trainer, warns against a brash assessment when turning towards.  Encouraging us to turn towards with an appropriate amount of positivity or else risk slipping into self defeatism or doubt.  The turning towards, yes is choosing to look at what we typically want to ignore and more important, it is creating a space for something else to happen.  

So I'm going to be turning towards a fresh sense of self care and wonderment.   How about you -  what would you like to turn toward and how will you do it?  Just as important how will you remember to do it? 

Nothing is more intimate than noticing the breath in the body, meditating with no expectations except for coming home to just who this body is and what it needs. On February 12th the San Francisco Buddhist Center will be offering meditation classes again.  I will be co-leading the Mindfulness of Breathing, an age old practice of bringing awareness to your breath and I hope you can join me.  Take advantage of this fresh New Year, naturally a reflective time, and turn towards the things that are calling you and important for your body right now.   

March On !  
Shunya
 

Choosing To Yield

Yield, such an amazing word. We don't often think about this word unless we are driving and even then there is some apprehension in the action of yielding. I suppose this could be because there is an element of uncertainty, of vulnerability. And yet Yield can be such an interesting word - soft, generous, intentional, purposeful - while ultimately taking you where you want to go, though perhaps a little slower.

 So yield in our driving, in our striving? Not only can we yield in our actions but also in our bodies. Softening the tensions in my shoulder blades, quads, between my eyes. So many places that tend to grip in Anticipation, as if putting the brakes on. Yield is a generous gesture that is inviting flow, not braking, and when approached from a mindset of cooperation can be a graceful movement forward.

 Augusta Moore, my Feldenkrais teacher, asks us to consider yielding in our cells. On a cellular level to soften, to be receptive and curious, to stop our habitual responses for just a minute and see how our bodies might respond in a different way than what might be predicted. To encourage this deeper yield it is helpful to be in a safe environment, reflective, mindful state.

Vidyamala Burch, the founder of Breathworks, has a meditative practice of leaning into your difficult situation as if leaning the weightiness of the situation onto a bale of hay, noticing how the bale yields a little under your weight, softens the hardness of resistance. I find this helpful in letting my imagination understand what it means to yield on a cellular level - because really who knows how to do that?? It's something worthwhile learning and experimenting with.

Just for a moment consider "What part of your body wants to yield?" Is there something in your mental, physical, or emotional being that would benefit from slowing down, stepping back, taking a deep breath, and yielding to the sweetness of the moment? What is calling you to pause and soften? Could it be a warm ray of sunlight on your face, a tight sore back that lets out a little complaint each time you move, or a sense of overwhelm that feels just so darn uncomfortable. The signs are all around us and we get to choose our approach - screeching brakes, distracted confusion, OR gently, with full intention, leaning into the situation and yielding into the flow.
 

Often we find ourselves stressed out in overwhelm and the yield signs seem to be screaming at us to pay attention. But wait I don't have time to soften, what about my responsibilities? My To Do list? The many expectations I carry on my shoulders? So it seems easier to ignore those yield signs, go into overdrive and before you know it - Crash !! Lots of drama and disappointment to go around. Stopped action and possibly some collateral damage.
 

The roller coaster of surge and crash with little yielding might be an exciting life for some or satisfying for a short period of time and then sooner or later the accumulative effect on the body says no more. Think about your car, or your spine, or your gut - just how many crashes can they go through before they no longer function in the ways you need them to? The mind too grows weary of constantly pushing upstream with little respite, sheer will power only goes so far and how pleasant is that?

 So where in your life is there the opportunity to experience the Yield?  It could be in yoga class, during a work discussion, figuring out with your partner how to manage a difficult situation, or even right now - check in, is there anywhere you are holding tension or notice tightness in your body? Let your breath find and soften this place, imagining your muscles and skin giving in a little to the weight of gravity.
 

I think that sometimes we worry "If I slow down I might just stop, or worse I might fail." And I would like to suggest that if you give it a try you might just find yourself right in the middle of that easy flow of life you've been dreaming about.